AW: Morning Pages 2024: No.5

I can hear the rail yard down the street. They seem particularly loud this morning as they are pushing cars around with those big engines. My eldest son loves those engines and he got really upset when he read that they were going to be getting replaced with more modern ones. The engines are a bit over 60 years old and getting worn out. But just about the whole town is up in arms over this and the company is receiving a lot of angry mail. I'm hoping that they can donate one of the engines to the transportation museum up by the city and keep one for the annual leaf peeper train.

The last leaf peeper train was in autumn of 2019 and it was a big hit. We're hoping that they'll resume running it this year. The kids had an awesome time riding the train. I watched them board with their father and uncle. There wasn't room for me and my social phobia was already making me feel claustrophobic just standing with the people taking pictures.

Morning (somewhere) Pages 2024: No. 4

 I apologize for forgetting to write in here. I have been struggling with sleep issues (to the point that I now use a CPAP machine). It isn't resolved yet and as a result, it is messing with my memory and my ability to focus. As of right now it is 8:41 pm, so it isn't morning when I'm writing this. To say the least I am some what embarrassed and disappointed with myself. My health isn't doing too great and that's having a negative impact on everything. I can't just force myself to stay awake and work on things when my blood sugar is over 170. I'm working with my doctor and trying very hard to fix my eating habits so that I don't have that happen as often as it has been.

I try not to be ashamed of being ill. It's really hard because my parents stupidly treated all illness as a moral failing. Or I was accused of being a hypochondriac. Imagine that, a six year old kid with pink eye being accused of faking it for attention. That's just how they were and this is why we are not in contact with them. I don't know if they've changed but I don't rightly care.

I still have several minutes left on the timer and no ideas on what to add. I'll do my best to get cracking on this work and hopefully you will have more uplifting content to enjoy.