AW: Morning Pgs. 2025: Day 26

For the first time in ages, I'm actually organized enough to get this written. Things are getting hectic as we approach June and Cuddle Bear's upcoming graduation. There's only six tickets that can be used to get in to see him graduate in the auditorium. That means that there's going to be some pissed off relatives. I don't really care about that. I'm just glad that he decided he wanted to go through with walking across the stage and receiving his diploma that way instead of through the mail.

Driver's education classes are looking like they're not going to happen this year. We simply have run out of time to get him his learner's permit. Cuddle Bear will not want to cuddle after hearing that news. I am just tired of running to make things happen for the kids. So, I'm not going to feel guilt over this because I was doing most of the work for him to make it happen. Beloved made a great point, Cuddle Bear has to decide if he is going to be an adult about this and make it happen.

Snuggle Bug has made no noises about learning to drive yet. He's mentioned some cars that he wants to have because he thinks they look cool. I can get behind this. I have cars that I think look really nifty. But he isn't interested in driving yet. So, before any conversations about owning a vehicle happens, he has to learn how to operate one safely. Cuddle Bear knows exactly what vehicle he wants, his late grandfather's truck. Getting him to do the legwork for this driver's ed. class has been like pulling hen's teeth. This is why there's been zero discussion about the truck. 

AW: Morning (somewhere) pgs. 2025: Day 25?

 I did not drop off the face of the earth. My doctor put me on a beta blocker with some side effects that mimic the symptoms of depression for me. It's been hard for me to find energy to write, do housework, or even just read a book. My ability to focus is pretty much shot. I just sit and stare trying to remember what I was supposed to be doing.

Now is not the time for that sort of thing. My eldest son has things coming up to get ready for graduation. We also have to get him his learner's permit so that he can take the driver's education class this summer. I have a ton of paperwork to do for myself and the kids to get things sorted out for supports that they need. When I should be working on all of this stuff, I am sleeping on the couch or sitting infront of the computer spaced out. I am, to say the least, frustrated with the situation.

I don't fully understand why my resting heart rate is now high enough to require this. It could be stress or anxiety. I have more than my share of that. I am making dietary changes to make my diet more heart friendly. Because the requirements for a heart healthy diet are not too different from a diabetic healthy diet, it is not requiring too many changes. But all of this is fairly vexing and I just don't have time for one more chronic condition to get in my way. I have too much to do.