I literally have 71k words in my NaNoWriMo manuscript and no idea what the hell I am doing. But I finally hit one of my plot points. I still feel like I am in the middle of this thing and I don't know if I'm going to be at that point when I hit 80k or higher. Some writing projects, being in the middle isn't that bad. I just plug away and keep working through my plot and outline. The characters don't go off the rails too much. It is a relatively easy thing to get the big word counts for the day and still feel motivated to keep working.
I haven't been doing much writing by hand this month. I haven't even updated my planner because I have been so focused on NaNoWriMo. Today is not going to be a big wordcount day because today I am going to be fixing my planner. It is this cross between a bullet journal and diary. I keep a diary as well, but the planner gets more frequent updates. My mood is still being garbage because of Seasonal Affective Disorder despite the fact that I now have a light therapy lamp. I'm still working on figuring out how to use the thing most effectively. As such, I think that I am not getting optimal results because I don't have it positioned correctly.
It has been a melencholic couple of weeks. I have found myself thinking about friends that I have lost over the years and the good times that we had before that won't come again. I know part of this line of thinking is my depression. It is also because I still have mutual friends with those people that are still living. So, I still hear talk of them and see evidence of their presence in those mutual friends' lives. It's painful but once bridges burn, you can't go back.
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