*throws confetti*
Yay, I have reached thirty posts. In how long...
I'm confident that my daily blog post will go up as I work on this (and avoid things like another sinus infection). I would have posted something yesterday but I've been struggling with an erotic story that I can't quite manage go get working right. Beloved suggested it might not be my genre. I retorted that if I tried hard enough and I work on practicing long enough, I could manage to begin writing in it. I half expected him to argue with me over that point but he didn't. He said that a good place for me to start on that would be reading more erotica.
I just seem to be hitting roadblocks in my writing in just about all area. I am getting frustrated with the fact that I am unable to go from idea to completed draft in a few steps. I get about halfway through the idea and then it fizzles out. I have tried drawing up outlines. That doesn't work as well as it did before. I have tried just 'pantsing' the process and I get to about the halfway point and it goes flat.
Some one suggested that I might be afraid of something in completing a work. I don't know what about that could scare me. But, honestly, I am afraid. I'm afraid that I'm not good enough to be writing erotica. I'm afraid that my fantasy series is just escapeism and that it's not really worth reading. I'm afraid that all of those nasty things that were said about my writing are true. I know that right now I'm dealing with Seasonal Affective Disorder. I know that right now, I am struggling with anxiety issues.
Perhaps my performance anxiety comes out of those things. I don't know.
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